45:50 is when she starts singing "feelings," an absolutely amazing song
HTRK, "Synthetik" (Work, Work, Work)
there is something in this video that touches me like fingers on my skin, but from the inside out.
i need to walk and empty my mind with each step. i need to cleanse these cavities in my chest and head of all the gray matter. there is so much to me outside of what i am to other people. in fact, it might be most apt to say that what i am to other people encapsulates an entire self other than my truest form.
yes, that must be it. a shadow of me, the sun shining on my back and the world sucking up my reflection as i gaze straight ahead towards the horizon.
there are many places i wish i was right at this moment. where i am is not one of them.
soft feelings that can only be achieved with the presence of another
something that consoles me is a warm place in my head that i am becoming more familiar with
is is a place where no one else is allowed
it is a bed on which no one else can lay
hands on me that i put there
things inside me that i meaningfully placed
i feel so warm knowing that these things are mine
no abandonment by anyone or anything can make me feel like i have experienced loss
when what i experienced has been retained inside me
and i can cultivate the garden as i please
^ isn't that the most beautiful photograph you have ever seen?